i resolve

1. I resolve the same thing every year--nope, not to lose weight. To drink more often! Drinking is good for me. And I ain't talking water.

2. To clean my oven. I confess, it's been 3 1/2 years. I must put an end to my procrastination and just get in there. Ewww...

3. To spend more time with my sister and mother (before I move away). Since Rob decided not to see me anymore I am in need of a friend to hang out with. Who better than my sister and mother? Especially since I already like them!

4. I've saved the biggest and hardest till last (wish it was a penis). Anyway, I realized I must change the way I feel about my financial situation. I am forever feeling poor. This is all wrong because I am by no means poor. I have a cushy little nest egg, I just refuse to spend it. And it is a fact that I need and deserve a better paying job. It has kept me from getting ahead the last 5 years. That's all part of the plan of moving, and starting over. Moving to a new location is the perfect opportunity to change other habits.

I am so looking forward to this year, for myself and for Christie.

nurse dinamo

Yesterday I was the glue. I visited my sister, my mother and my father, all in different locations. Each is in need of repair, so to speak, so I decided to head back home and make a clean sweep.

Since I'm feeling strong and well-fortified with love these days, I thought it my family duty to spread a little around. I started with Lynn, my sister. I spent the night at her new apartment and found out she wasn't nearly as heartbroken as I had thought over a recent issue with her lover. Well I guess not, considering she spent a couple hours chatting with new prospects on match.com. I watched in amusement.

Next stop was Mom's. She's been really stressed worrying about my sister, plus she's lonely since her boyfriend kind of left to do his own thing. So I did a lot of listening and not much talking. It's kind of weird because she has no clue about my newest relationship with Andy. She's in the dark about a big part of my life. But that's ok. It wasn't about me today.

Final stop was to visit my dad in the hospital. He's been there for 2 months now. This is a man I've gotten to know better in the last 2 months than for all of my life. My parents were divorced when I was a baby, and I never really felt like he was a father to me. Nice man, but he could never relate to my world, or me to his. Before this hospital stay I would see him maybe 3 times a year.

Now when I see him I feel like I am doing something really valuable. I am filling his empty life with something good. He smiles when he sees me walk in, and I've had the chance to show my love to him in ways I normally wouldn't. I've stroked his hand to help him feel better or to wake him up, I've fed him, and I've given him hugs that last longer than the usual 3 times a year hugs.

It is depressing to go into the hospital and to imagine what its' like to be stuck in there so long. But when I am with him, and long after I've left, I feel uplifted and grateful that I've been given the chance to share my love.

I have also been amused by some things I've heard and observed during recent visits. I realized where I got my beautiful feet! Dad's feet are probably the nicest feet I've ever seen on a man. Which helps make up for the fact that his ears are enormously big. When did that happen?!

Also, he told me about being in the National Guard when he was young (I never knew that), and once told a facinating story about how he was getting out of the hospital beacuse he had to go photograph President Obama. Although I think that was a delusion from some of the drugs they'd given him. Entertaining nonetheless!