I knew CJ from high school. We weren't close by any means, we were more like acquaintances. He (said he) always liked me and I thought he was a really nice guy, just not my type. Besides I was always in a relationship. After high school I didn't see him until our 20-yr high school reunion, at which time we made small talk and he walked me safely to my car. That was that.
Last year at this time he sent me a hello message through classmates.com. I was only listed there because I was hoping to find my best friend from childhood (a fruitless task, she's still awol). Anyway, CJ writes me and I wrote back. Long story short, he's still a nice guy. We've gotten together to hang out about once a month for the past year.
He has been separated for over 2 years. His wife lost interest in him and started another relationship. He has 2 daughters, 18 and 20, who are the center of his life. He has not even dated since his split. I'm not sure why. He had asked me if I was in a relationship and was disappointed when I said yes. However, we agreed to be buddies.
We've had some good times going to concerts, hiking, going out to eat, watching football games. I cook dinner for him sometimes and he really appreciates that. I'm just trying to remind him that life is good, since he's somewhat bitter about his marriage ending. I like talking to him about his family, his feelings towards them, and about his mother who died suddenly when he was only 18. I feel like I'm the only adult he can have a decent conversation with. I'm trying to keep him open and expressive. Maybe I want to help him heal.
What I really like about CJ is his joy of fatherhood and the importance he places on family. I must say that I really admire those qualities in a man. Yesterday he wrote me an email. Here's an excerpt that really touched me:
Last year at this time he sent me a hello message through classmates.com. I was only listed there because I was hoping to find my best friend from childhood (a fruitless task, she's still awol). Anyway, CJ writes me and I wrote back. Long story short, he's still a nice guy. We've gotten together to hang out about once a month for the past year.
He has been separated for over 2 years. His wife lost interest in him and started another relationship. He has 2 daughters, 18 and 20, who are the center of his life. He has not even dated since his split. I'm not sure why. He had asked me if I was in a relationship and was disappointed when I said yes. However, we agreed to be buddies.
We've had some good times going to concerts, hiking, going out to eat, watching football games. I cook dinner for him sometimes and he really appreciates that. I'm just trying to remind him that life is good, since he's somewhat bitter about his marriage ending. I like talking to him about his family, his feelings towards them, and about his mother who died suddenly when he was only 18. I feel like I'm the only adult he can have a decent conversation with. I'm trying to keep him open and expressive. Maybe I want to help him heal.
What I really like about CJ is his joy of fatherhood and the importance he places on family. I must say that I really admire those qualities in a man. Yesterday he wrote me an email. Here's an excerpt that really touched me:
Yes I am enjoying my daughters' company. It is a good thing for my Soul, can not imagine my life without them.That is just cool. CJ is a good man. I really wish he could find a partner. But perhaps it's not his time. I like being his friend and reminding him that he is worthy of having everything he desires in life.
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