you're mine tonight

He had that look of love...you know, the one that sucks me in. And I needed to be sucked in.

I've been waaaay too distracted the last couple months. All that planning, racing to get things accomplished and scratched off my list. Fretting about packing and wondering if I'll get everything done in time for my house closing...it has left me stressed.

Even on my last trip to LA to see Andy. I didn't find myself falling into him, surrendering and completely loving it. I was guarded, and there was more planning, and worrying about things. This is not who I want to be.

I like the me that opens up and trusts, and follows the love wherever it takes me. I want to fall madly in love and give myself over to him.

The other night on skype Andy was gazing at me for an unexpectedly long time. He had the most contented look on his face, sort of grinning and he looked absolutely hot and adorable. I needed that look. It caught me and held me and I felt a stronger connection to him--one I haven't felt since I went into planning mode.

This is the look that makes everything else go away. It's like looking in on your whole life and suddenly realizing what's important and what's not. He left me floating.